on getting older

a few weeks from now and i'll be going home to the philippines to visit my family once again, some of them i haven't seen in two years. incidentally, the day that i'll be going home is the same day that i'll be celebrating my birthday.

that's something that i dont really really look forward too.. for one, i'll be on the road/air for half the day. and then, i'll be getting old. let's face it, it may just be numbers but it still adds up. i may look young but i have to act like my age, dress like my age. think like my age.

what's worse is that i have to face the nagging questions of relatives and friends about my non existent relationships. its like a time bomb waiting to explode.. with them acting as the human timers. the hell i care, right? but i do, im worried about them worrying about me because really, there is nothing to worry. i haven't find the one but it isn't my fault... i may be better of as single than be miserably in love just like people i know.

i maybe cynic and guarded when it comes to love but who can blame me. i have never met a guy who will make me think and feel otherwise. maybe when i did, it would be like flying to the moon and back to earth.. but for now, i'll keep my feet firmly on the ground.

well, going back... turning a year older when on your 30ish is a lot diferent that getting a year old when your on your 20s.. if your single, its way different and if your single with no kids, its way way way different.. now, the biological clock is ticking and the pressures to get hitched is everywhere. ayan, nabalik na naman ako sa previous topic ko... why can't i steer away from this?!